The Magical Fruit

(c) Loretta Lynn,

(c) Loretta Lynn,

A few weeks ago we did “plant proteins” in Food Science lab.

Aka, beans, nuts, legumes, etc.  This involved eating lots of tofu and lots of beans.

Let me start by saying that normally, I pick beans out of everything.  I don’t like them.  Chili? Should be beanless.  Chipotle? Just give me the steak, please.  Childish? Absolutely.  But I. Don’t. Like. Beans.

What I did, rather surprisingly, enjoy was the tofu smoothie.  It just tasted like a regular fruit smoothie – which I adore as much as I dislike beans.  So, while I only ate a bite or two of all the bean stuff, I probably drank a good 8 ounces of the smoothie (no one else wanted it.  But the ten-bean soup was a hit.  I don’t understand people).

Did you know that it’s not just beans that have a toxic effect on the system? Tofu does too.  Know why? It’s made out of soybeans.

Thanks to class, I now know exactly what caused my extreme discomfort about 10 hours after lab.  Beans – and their evil counterparts – have certain complex carbohydrates in them (raffinose and stachyose, if you’re curious).  When the beans are soaked in water, which of course they must be to be eaten, these water-soluble carbs quite naturally dissolve in the water.

This is why it’s important not to cook them in the soaking water.  The soaking water should be discarded.

You should also rinse them to get any last vestiges of raff/stach off of them.

To this day (a whole week and a half later), I am traumatized with the memory of that night.  I haven’t had such a bad stomachache since the day I got diagnosed with celiac disease and went out and ate half a pizza and an order of cheesy bread in rebellion.

I thought maybe I was, you know, dying.

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